Hello, Newman…
Check out this Bar Maxim video, in which I chat with actor Wayne Knight about his TV Land comedy, The Exes, while he whips up his favorite specialty cocktail.
Category: Food & Dining
Maxim Video: Drink Like a Navy SEAL
Here’s what happens when Biggs and Saw – two decorated Navy SEALs and stars of Discovery Channel’s Battleground: Rhino Wars – swing by the Maxim offices to make me a drink.
Watch the original video on Maxim.com or the Maxim Xbox app.
Maxim: 72 Hours in Dublin: Drink, Cry, Repeat
Maxim and Guinness sent me to Dublin for St. Patrick’s Day, and all I brought back was this epic hangover. Oh, and I also met the President of Ireland, and took a picture of the toilets in the White House, obviously. Read the story on Maxim.com.
Citysearch: Best New York Bars for a One-Night Stand
Thank god for alcohol, without which no one would ever have gotten laid–least of all that snaggletoothed disaster sitting at the bar. But after a few car bombs, she starts to look pretty good, and soon it’s off to your place. But not every New York bar is conducive to meeting Mr. or Ms. Right Now. Where to go when you’re on the market for a good old-fashioned, no-strings-attached one-night stand? These six bars, where the pretenses are low and the odds of scoring are high. Continue reading
Citysearch: New York Bars I’ve Fallen Down In
Every true drinker has woken up at least once to discover a bruise or drinking-related injury from the previous night. Me, more than others. Since the day I turned 18–er, 21–I’ve displayed an almost magnificent tendency to drink, slip and fall, and I’ve done it at bars across New York City. Why am I telling you all this? Because I’m drunk now, obviously. But seriously, watch your step at these seven bars, or you could end up like me–and as my parents can confirm, you really don’t want that. Continue reading
Citysearch: Bars That Make Me Wanna Kill Myself
Thirty-year-old frat boys who confuse Murray Hill with Sigma Chi. Hedge fund douche bags who refer to the Hamptons as “The ‘Tones.” Brainless girls in Jessica Simpson brand stilettos who are about 20 pounds too heavy for that dress. Staten Islanders. These are a few of my least favorite things. And you can find them all at these five bars. Continue reading
Citysearch: Party Like It’s Spring Break
Photo courtesy of The Big Easy
It’s nearly mid-March, which means that if you’re a college student, you’re probably getting ready to spend a week with 10 other hoodlums, holed up in some beachside shanty, soaking up moderate quantities of sun and lethal quantities of booze, in honor of that great American pastime known as spring break. Well, guess what: Even if your undergraduate years are over, you needn’t dip to Tijuana to partake in the sort of lewd, depraved behavior pictured above. There are plenty of bars where even the most respectable professionals you can experience the thrills of spring break–from the alcohol poisoning to the scantily clad girls–right here on the Isle of Manhattan. Here they are.
Citysearch: What Would the ’08 Candidates Drink? A Super Tuesday Special Report
Super Tuesday is finally upon us, and while a gaggle of legitimate news outlets will be focused on boring us to death with talk of “precincts,” “delegates” and “exit polls,” we at Citysearch are bringing you the kind of hard-hitting, no-nonsense reporting that really matters. Specifically, we’re investigating a question that is of the utmost importance when it comes to selecting a new leader of the free world: “What would the presidential candidates drink, and where would they drink it?”
So, if you’re wondering how Obama’s plan to get the hell outta Dodge (where by “Dodge” I mean “Baghdad”) compares to McCain’s plan to keep us there for another 100 years, I couldn’t tell you. And if you’re unsure of how Clinton’s plan to offer universal health care differs from Romney’s plan to withhold it, I just don’t know. But what I do know is that by the time the polls close on Tuesday night, all of the candidates, winners and losers alike, will be fiending for a liquid fix.
So here’s our take on what and where each of them would drink–if the cameras (and evangelists) weren’t watching. Continue reading
Citysearch: Places We’d Like to See Squashed by the Cloverfield Monster
Photo: Cloverfield hits theaters this weekend
Lady Liberty is just one of the New York City landmarks that takes a beating in the highly anticipated new monster movie, “Cloverfield,” which hits theaters today. From what I can surmise, the premise goes something like this: Young, fun-loving crowd of New Yorkers are at one of those cheesy parties where the hosts videotape their guests talking about how totally awesome the party is, when all hell breaks loose. Suddenly New York is under attack by a savage, futuristic-Godzilla-style monster. Chaos and massive destruction ensue as said monster proceeds to obliterate everything (and everyone) in its path, all but leveling the city. But every movie has a hero (although judging from the “Cloverfield” cast, that hero needn’t be a celebrity), and ours turns out to be one of the dudes who was at that party before all the madness began. Ultimately, that guy, whoever he is, leads a mission to defeat the monster, thereby restoring order and saving the city.
With any luck, “Cloverfield” will deliver at least one good old-fashioned impaling–perhaps one that involves the Empire State Building needle, for example–but suffice it to say that there will be blood. So, at the risk of offending a broad spectrum of our audience, we’re paying tribute to this epic movie with a little hit list of our own: Places We’d Like to See Squashed by the “Cloverfield” Monster. Continue reading
Product: Portable Beer Pong Table
Meatheads, Yale-style
The only thing better than absurd drinking paraphernalia is absurd drinking-game paraphernalia, and nothing says “I’m a douchebag” quite like carrying around an inflatable beer pong table. Which is exactly why the $45 Portopong will make the perfect holiday gift for that special frat boy* in your life. As with most alcohol-related products–like the booze belt, another real gem–the Portopong is entirely practical to haul around town, you know, just in case you find yourself back in college. Then again, if you carry both the Portopong and an air mattress around with you at all times, you can play beer pong whenever you want without ever having to worry about where you’re going to pass out afterwards. Order now before the manufacturer jacks up the price due to overwhelming demand. Just kidding.
*Contrary to the scene depicted in the photo, this is obviously not a toy for nerds, but rather for the quarterbacks who torment them. It’s just that that photo was taken at a Yale tailgating party. Go figure.
Product: p.i.n.k. Vodka
Way back when, you could simply head to a bar, order a vodka on the rocks and call it a wrap. But these days, there are so many different liquor choices it’s enough to make your head spin even before you’ve had a drink. Thanks to new p.i.n.k.-brand vodka, now you can have your 80-proof, super-premium vodka and drink it, too. Sip it straight,or test out such original recipes as “p.i.n.k. My Ride.” Not only does p.i.n.k. Vodka claim to be the “world’s perfect party spirit,” but it’s also infused with caffeine and guarana, so you can ditch the Red Bull mixer, or other, um, “means” of staying energized all night.
(A VERSION OF THIS ARTICLE WAS ORIGINALLY PUBLISHED IN YRB MAGAZINE COPYRIGHT © 2006)
Product: Bong Vodka
Whether spilled or swigged, nothing sucks more than getting too close to dirty bong water; even if it’s that same grimy, brown, bacteria-filled water that sets the bong apart from other, less refined methods of toking up. But thanks to musician/designer/artist Jimi Beach, now there’s finally a way to drink from a bong without gagging: fill it with premium vodka. Produced in Holland, Bong Spirit Vodka is sure to be a big hit – at least until it becomes legal to import, umm, other things from the Netherlands.
(ORIGINALLY PUBLISHED IN YRB MAGAZINE COPYRIGHT © 2006)
Justine Goodman 