Thank god for alcohol, without which no one would ever have gotten laid–least of all that snaggletoothed disaster sitting at the bar. But after a few car bombs, she starts to look pretty good, and soon it’s off to your place. But not every New York bar is conducive to meeting Mr. or Ms. Right Now. Where to go when you’re on the market for a good old-fashioned, no-strings-attached one-night stand? These six bars, where the pretenses are low and the odds of scoring are high. Continue reading
Every true drinker has woken up at least once to discover a bruise or drinking-related injury from the previous night. Me, more than others. Since the day I turned 18–er, 21–I’ve displayed an almost magnificent tendency to drink, slip and fall, and I’ve done it at bars across New York City. Why am I telling you all this? Because I’m drunk now, obviously. But seriously, watch your step at these seven bars, or you could end up like me–and as my parents can confirm, you really don’t want that. Continue reading
Thirty-year-old frat boys who confuse Murray Hill with Sigma Chi. Hedge fund douche bags who refer to the Hamptons as “The ‘Tones.” Brainless girls in Jessica Simpson brand stilettos who are about 20 pounds too heavy for that dress. Staten Islanders. These are a few of my least favorite things. And you can find them all at these five bars. Continue reading
It’s nearly mid-March, which means that if you’re a college student, you’re probably getting ready to spend a week with 10 other hoodlums, holed up in some beachside shanty, soaking up moderate quantities of sun and lethal quantities of booze, in honor of that great American pastime known as spring break. Well, guess what: Even if your undergraduate years are over, you needn’t dip to Tijuana to partake in the sort of lewd, depraved behavior pictured above. There are plenty of bars where
even the most respectable professionals you can experience the thrills of spring break–from the alcohol poisoning to the scantily clad girls–right here on the Isle of Manhattan. Here they are.
The Tribeca Film Festival is off to a strong start, with the stars turning out for last night’s world premiere of “Baby Mama” at the Ziegfeld. We were in attendance at the official after-party, held at the Museum of Modern Art, which could have been mistaken for a “Saturday Night Live” reunion. In addition to Lorne Michaels and “Baby Mama” stars Amy Poehler and Tina Fey, guests at the MoMa included a long list of present and former cast-members, like Jimmy Fallon (who eventually left the party with former “SNL” player Chris Kattan), Rachel Dratch, Jason Sudeikis, Fred Armisen, Molly Shannon and even Chevy Chase. But the superstar of the evening was Steve Martin, who sauntered in wearing a panama hat, spent most of his time at a table with Lorne and Chevy and later departed without obliging the fans who were waiting outside for an autograph. (That said, Martin’s role in “Baby Mama” is much funnier than the rest of the movie.) Continue reading
With any luck, “Cloverfield” will deliver at least one good old-fashioned impaling–perhaps one that involves the Empire State Building needle, for example–but suffice it to say that there will be blood. So, at the risk of offending a broad spectrum of our audience, we’re paying tribute to this epic movie with a little hit list of our own: Places We’d Like to See Squashed by the “Cloverfield” Monster. Continue reading
Way back when, you could simply head to a bar, order a vodka on the rocks and call it a wrap. But these days, there are so many different liquor choices it’s enough to make your head spin even before you’ve had a drink. Thanks to new p.i.n.k.-brand vodka, now you can have your 80-proof, super-premium vodka and drink it, too. Sip it straight,or test out such original recipes as “p.i.n.k. My Ride.” Not only does p.i.n.k. Vodka claim to be the “world’s perfect party spirit,” but it’s also infused with caffeine and guarana, so you can ditch the Red Bull mixer, or other, um, “means” of staying energized all night.
(A VERSION OF THIS ARTICLE WAS ORIGINALLY PUBLISHED IN YRB MAGAZINE COPYRIGHT © 2006)
Whether spilled or swigged, nothing sucks more than getting too close to dirty bong water; even if it’s that same grimy, brown, bacteria-filled water that sets the bong apart from other, less refined methods of toking up. But thanks to musician/designer/artist Jimi Beach, now there’s finally a way to drink from a bong without gagging: fill it with premium vodka. Produced in Holland, Bong Spirit Vodka is sure to be a big hit – at least until it becomes legal to import, umm, other things from the Netherlands.
(ORIGINALLY PUBLISHED IN YRB MAGAZINE COPYRIGHT © 2006)